The Comfort Zone
Hi everyone! Happy "fear monster Friday!"
Forewarned is forearmed: Some NSFW language follows....
George had a tough week this week. I freakin' love Bali, but it has this magic to it that just brings up ALL of your shit (so you can heal it). I think I wasn't quite fully prepared for it.
I'm writing my book here, and it's a comic book version of my story -- but it's real. It's raw. It's super vulnerable. You can find out more when it comes out, but the short version of the story is that I've had some pretty fucked up shit happen to me. The process of going "from victim to victory" has been a long and difficult one. (That's the working title of the book, by the way!)
Writing about it is almost like reliving it all over again. I'm freaking out. George is freaking out. And today, it culminated in an all-out nervous breakdown. I had one of those lovely panic attacks where my nervous system actually thought I was dying. Spoiler alert: I wasn't. I'm still here.
This week was just way out of my comfort zone.
The thing is, the best stuff happens when you're out of your comfort zone. There is beauty in vulnerability. (Thank you, Mastin Kipp, for pointing this out to me! I feel pretty ugly when I'm crying.)
The trick is to not do what I do in the comics -- George is really useful for an awareness tool. I'm aware when George appears that it's my fear talking. But the thing is, if you want to proceed outside of your comfort zone, you have to really commit to feeling what you're feeling.
Own it. Feel it. Love it. Accept it.
Then it passes. And your comfort zone gets a little bit bigger.
Sending you all lots of love and a big hug from Bali!
Jillian